Affects on Children

When people get married they start a new life together by joining/buying property, items for the house and having children. But with almost 50 percent of marriages ending in divorce, it is a wonder what affects this has on the children. There are many different affects that children have when their parents are going through a divorce. How kids act depends on how old they are, if the divorce is messy, and the type of relationship their parents had. It does not take a person with a PhD to know that children are extremely affected by a parents’ divorce. In fact “many studies show that, to a child, divorce is equivalent to the pain of the death of the parent” (Demick). Also many children believe it is their fault and their parents don’t love them anymore.
There are researchers who have broken down the affects and reactions children have between 4 different age groups. Preschool (ages 3-5) will have sleep disturbances, a fear of separation from the custodial parent and a yearning for the non-custodial parent. Early latency (ages 6 ½-8) will openly grieve and have fantasies that their parents will happily reunite in the not-so-distant future. Late latency (ages 8-11) will show anger, a feeling of powerlessness, and will try to take care of the parents (at an expense of their own needs). Also this is the age were a ‘good’ parent and a ‘bad’ parent is formed. Adolescence (ages 12-18) will show signs of depression, suicidal ideation and violently acting out. They will also be affect down the road with fears about future relationships (Eleoff).

Of course every child is not going to act out, have commitment issues, or depression but it is important to know that these things could happen. It is essential for parents to not put their child in the middle of fights and make them pick sides. Also it is ideal to have a clean divorce and if there is fighting not to do it in front of the child. But above all it is best to talk to the child to reassure it is not their fault and try to explain why this is happening.

Resources:
http://www.essortment.com/all/divorcehoweffe_rhcq.htm http://www.childadvocate.net/divorce_effects_on_children.htm